Our Funeral Directors and staff


Our main Funeral Director at Walderslade is Emma

At last we have a lady funeral director, and we can all take a rest because, as with most women of a certain age, they know best (bet you won’t argue with her when you meet her) Anyway she is so keen to do the job that I hardly get a look in these days.

The dog is the love of her life, after her boyfriend of course. Well maybe. Mr BooBoo is at the office with Emma and frequently makes an appearance during the arrangement interview.

Outside Emma and BooBoo

As you can see, unlike Emma, he loves having his photo taken. This is him having a break from running the office for me! Those with good eyes will notice a difference between above and below. Boo is a few years older now and doing well. Emma on the other hand wasn’t so keen on another picture.

This is the first time we managed to get a picture of Emma, conducting a funeral. She’s not exactly shy, I would say more “you take my picture and I’ll get you later” sort of comment. So everyone else has rather, chickened out. Anyway I managed this one and bless her, she is smiling. Probably thinking up some evil way to get her own back on me.

Emma is our first lady funeral director and we are all very proud of the work she is doing. Certainly she gets more thank you letters than I do. Well done Emma. You will find her based in the office at Walderslade. I can’t work out what she has on her feet. Looks like slippers!

Emmas first

Ha. You haven’t heard the latest! Emma recently asked me (Jan 2014) if she could have a picture of a flower with a butterfly on it, to go on the wall in the interview room. Hmmm.. I think I said show me first. Today I am here and just checking everything is tidy and clean everywhere as I do from time to time. I looked in the interview room, and have found what can only be described as a small butterfly farm! Its not a picture either, but a wall. Actually its, well I don’t really know what it is. I tell you one thing, her poor parents must be longing for the day she moves out, and I can’t blame them. She’s completely barmy this one!

Chatham interview roomHaving said all that, I must tell you that if you do meet Emma, and are helped through your situation. I can assure you of her total and unconditional support. And I must add that after almost 40 years as a funeral director I have seen a few people come and go. In Emma’s case I can assure you that she is a most excellent and highly professional funeral director and I consider myself very fortunate to have her working with me. Emma would probably say I work with her.

Our main Funeral Director at Strood is Colin

Colin is a very good chap to have working with you at this time of need. I will get his picture, but he is a bit illusive at the moment. Colin used to be on the semi pro Snooker circuit, so he is used to mixing easily with anyone he see’s. In fact it could be said that he talks a bit too much? Sorry Colin, everyone likes you so don’t worry.

Colin is the main person at Strood. He is very thorough, but calm and discreet too. Just don’t mention the “S” word or you’ll never get away!

As with Emma, Colin has become a most excellent funeral director. Very caring, and very supportive of the families he helps. Again I am very fortunate to have him working with me.

Charlie Fritter

Charlie is our senior chap, sorry Charlie, but he has been the funeral director here for 25 years. So he knows a thing or three. He has managed to avoid the camera so far, but don’t worry, I’ll get his picture one day. He lives quite nearby, so his knowledge of the area is second to non. There quite simply isn’t a funeral director in the Medway Towns with more experience than him.

Michael Lawrence

I suppose, that having tormented everyone else for their pictures, it is only reasonable to add one of me too. All their moaning about “oh I hate that picture” and “that makes my bum look big” have been ignored. Funny how its only the lady funeral directors who worry about their bum looking big. For me of course the rule doesn’t apply and I managed to get a half decent picture of me from David. He takes good pictures, usually, however the subject (me) was sadly lacking on this occasion.

What a misery, and it looks like I’m shining my shoes up on the back of my trousers! I’m squinting and have a silly look on my face, and this day the sun was shining in my eyes, I like the sun, don’t get me wrong. This was at Medway Crematorium during the first part of their rebuilding works. It’s getting better every day now. New planting too. Anyway me. I’ve been arranging and conducting funerals since I was 19. The first burial I carried out on my own, was for a Mrs Woolven at Maidstone Cemetery. I still see the grave now when I go. I was only allowed to wash the wheels of the hearse for pocket money when I started all those years ago.

My mother and step father were funeral directors in Maidstone, and his father before him, etc. In a couple of years it will be 40 years experience for me, and I’m still learning new things all the time. I have to say that the staff do all the work, and they look after me so well. I’m a very lucky man to have such a great team working with me. Right you lot, back to work!